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Making tracks, bush-whacking, and more from the Police Blotter

Staff Report • Apr 30, 2014 at 8:55 AM

What'd you say about my momma? During a traffic stop, a man told police that his mother, who was not riding with him, had just smoked a marijuana cigarette and eaten a Xanax pill. Police later searched the vehicle and found nothing, but the man eventually produced what police called a "wooden pipe/marijuana cigarette holder" from his pockets. He was then cited for unlawful drug paraphernalia.

If at first you don't succeed ... A woman told police that a man punched her in the face, but, because she had no visible markings, and because she had been drinking, police didn't charge him with the crime. The next day, the woman called police to report the same assault. Police said she had forgotten making the same complaint the previous night.

Meat thief makes getaway. Police were called to Food City by an employee who told them that he watched a customer shove a pack of steaks into his pants. The employee told police that, after approaching the customer and asking about the steaks, the customer ran to his car and drove away. The employee gave police the license plate, however, and police said the man admitted to stealing the meat.

I'm lovin' it ... too much. Police were called to a local McDonald's after hearing reports that a man there refused to leave. After police arrived, they said the man, who they described as having a strong odor of alcohol about him, changed his mind and decided to walk home. Police said he appeared too drunk, however, and arrested him for public intoxication.

A rude awakening. A woman told police that her boyfriend woke her up and told her that he had totaled her car. The problem, she said, was that he had taken it without her permission the previous night. The boyfriend was later found in Elizabethton and arrested on a charge of theft of property.

Panties down, defenses up. An undercover police officer said that, after approaching a woman standing by herself between two cars, the woman told him, "She's peeing." The officer said he then noticed that another woman was squatting between the cars urinating in the parking lot. When the officer identified himself and reached for his badge, he said, the woman then lunged for him with a closed fist. Once the officer had subdued her, he said, he asked why she attacked him, to which she replied that she was defending her friend, who had been sexually assaulted in the past.

Beat around the bush, not through it. After arriving at the scene of a car crash, police said the driver tried to run away through a thicket of brush, but got stuck on some barbed wire and thorns. The driver, police said, crashed after he turned down a one-way street, went too far, and hit a tree at the end of the road. Police said the driver then failed field sobriety tests, and was arrested for driving under the influence, evading arrest, and driving on a suspended license.

For future reference, library cards are free. Police said an officer chased a man after he stole $184 worth of DVDs from the Johnson City Public Library. When the officer caught up with him, he said the man resisted and he had to be forced to the ground. When asked why he fought the officer, police said, the man said it was because he was drunk.

Making tracks. After stopping an East Tennessee State University student on suspicion of underage drinking, police said the student grabbed his ID and successfully fled on foot. Two days later, that officer learned how – the student was a member of the ETSU men's track and field team. Police said they contacted the student, who told them it was he who ran away from officers. The teen was later arrested for underage consumption and evading arrest.

Redefining 'smurfing.' Police said that, after approaching a woman who was digging through a dumpster behind an employment agency, she had blue paint covering her hands, mouth, and tongue. The woman declined an offer for medical attention, police said, and said she was "just looking for things" in the dumpster. Police said the woman gave them permission to search her backpack, upon which they found unprescribed Suboxone and Alprazolam pills. The woman was then cited for simple possession.

The Police Blotter is comprised of reports from the Johnson City Police Department.

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