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Police Blotter: Baby buggy bungle, porch crashers, less-than-grand larceny, and more

Staff Reports • Feb 18, 2014 at 8:51 AM

Leave Grandma out of it. A woman told her boyfriend she wanted to leave his house because his grandmother didn't like her. His response? He pushed her down, hit her in the face, and broke her phone when she tried to call police. It turns out, he was only delaying the inevitable. A few minutes later, she called the police from a friend's phone, and the boyfriend was arrested for simple assault domestic, vandalism, and interference with emergency calls.

Baby buggy bungle. A woman went to Wal-Mart to get a new stroller and a car seat for her baby, but decided against paying for them. She made it as far as the parking lot before a store employee caught up with her. When the employee confronted her, she shoved the shopping cart towards him and fled on foot. She may not get too far, though. Along with the baby items, the buggy had her cellphone, purse, and ID inside.

Drunk and naked, peas and carrots. Police were called to a local convenience store after an employee found a naked man lying down on the bathroom floor. They found him facedown on the ground in a puddle of his own vomit, with his pants around his ankles. After a brief trip to the hospital to make sure he was all right, they took him to jail on a public intoxication charge.

Less-than-grand larceny. A grocery store manager called police after he watched a woman leave his store with a buggy full of unpaid merchandise. Though the manager couldn't stop her from leaving, he did manage to write down the license plate. The woman was arrested, and the merchandise was recovered. Included in the $175 worth of merchandise was cat food, toilet paper, paper towels, and a Keurig coffee-maker.

Questionable priorities. Hospital personnel told police that two adults were using drugs after they had brought their infant in for emergency care. Witnesses said they saw the father snorting white powder, and that, earlier, the mother almost dropped the child. Security staff added that the father tried to hide a bag full of white pills inside the couch he was sitting on when they entered the room. The officer said that both parents appeared lethargic, had slurred speech, and were unsteady on their feet. Both were arrested for public intoxication.

Attempted hugging leads to arrest. A woman told police that her son had escaped from a man who tried to hug him while he was outside his house. When police found a man matching the boy's description, they said he appeared agitated and jittery. That may have had something to do with the methamphetamine they found in his pocket.

Not the brightest bulb. After being stopped because of a non-functioning headlight, a local man was arrested after police said they smelled a strong odor of marijuana about him. When the police searched him, they found 2 grams of marijuana inside a baggie in his pocket, along with a pipe and two ceramic cigarettes.

Toy crime story. A shopper at the local Toys "R" Us used a debit card to pay for more than $300 worth of merchandise, only, it wasn't their debit card. A man told police that his card had been used to make the purchase, even though he hadn't been to the store. The card was, however, still in his possession.

Intoxicating sales. Police arrived at the parking lot of the local Best Buy to find a man, who appeared to be highly intoxicated, punching his own car. During a search of his vehicle, police found a half-filled bottle of cognac inside. The man denied drinking the cognac, instead saying that he had been drinking whiskey.

Know your neighbors. A man told police that his neighbor beat him with a PVC pipe after he told her to turn off her TV so he could sleep. The man said that, as he was lying in bed, his neighbor entered his apartment and began hitting him in the head and arms with the pipe. On her way out of the apartment, she took the man's wallet, cellphone, and package of pipe tobacco. During the police investigation, a 911 call was made alleging the woman-in-question had overdosed on pills inside her hotel room. The woman was taken to the hospital and admitted for observation. When she wakes, she will have a warrant charging her with theft and assault waiting for her.

Covet not thy neighbor's porch. After taking a nap on his porch, a man was woken by police to learn that he was not, in fact, on his porch. It turns out, he was a block away from his house, and didn't know how he came to be on the porch. The police may have understood his confusion; they said he was highly intoxicated.

The Police Blotter is comprised of Johnson City Police Department reports.

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